Raising Our Boys to be Feminist Men
My Dad is a feminist. Now, don’t go telling him I called him that on the inter-webs. We’ve never officially talked about me labeling him one of my two favorite F words. But. Growing up we did lots of talking about how I can do anything that a boy can do. And there was always the slight hint that I might be able to do it even better.
(what’s a dad of three girls to do... eh?)
Of course I could do math, science, computers and lead with the best of them. Of course I could do all the farm chores, judge livestock, learn to weld, use a hammer, throw a ball, swing a bat and drive big badass trucks. And why wouldn’t I do all these things with a little flashy femininity in skirts and heels and lipstick.
On the flip side I also have a smart mama who knows how to take charge. As a principal she used her brains to improve test scores, her intuition to heal and connect the community, and her emotions were invested into every single child that walked through her door. My Mom was a feminist too.
So, when I found myself the only girl in my computer science classes I didn’t think twice about my ability due to my gender - that wasn’t my model growing up. Not once did I think I couldn’t become an engineer because I was a girl. Not once did I think I couldn’t do math and programming because my female brain didn’t work that way. But I did start to notice that I was the only female in an auditorium filled with boys.
Life outside the home in which I was raised had different definitions and expectations of what it was to be a girl coming into her own. And I didn't like the definitions the world had to offer me.
I love women in leadership. I love the idea of a woman President. And I love the talk about the world we want our daughters to grow up in. A world where a woman can do anything, be anything, go anywhere and her soul AND her body belongs to her and her alone.
But this change. This world that we want our girls to grow up in. It is not just for our daughters. It is for our sons too.
I want our sons to learn about their emotions, their intuition, how to lead from power not force and that wisdom is infinitely more influential than information. Because when they recognize these traits within themselves, they can see these strengths within their sisters.
I want them to witness their Mama’s coming together to lead with their hearts, the language of their Souls and the strength from the places where we were once broken and called less than.
For this is how they learn that the answers lie in our differences, our sameness and honoring the balance of the two. For when we rise up together we raise men who know of the power that lies in the feminine.
And when our daughters grow up to partner with these men. There is no fight. Because there is nothing to overcome. The battle between the sexes has been laid to rest and rising together has proven that Love has won.
This is the world I want for my daughter to grow up into. And my sons.
Until then. Feminist men we will raise.
Hey, Sister Sister!
Tell me about how you are raising your incredible boys to be amazing men. I love hearing from you.
And as always... sharing is much appreciated! xoxo